Despite being very busy this summer, we've slowed down enormously. My days are stretching longer and not just because there is more daylight, but even as I resist a somewhat monotonous day, I know that we need them to recharge. Honestly, this summer feels like I'm getting the rest I need. I can feel myself embracing this rest because I know that come mid-August, I'm going to have be renewed ready or not. My friend Elizabeth has been writing about renewal on her blog this year and I've learned that I need to devote some time to self-care. I've neglected my health in so many ways depleting myself into oblivion.
I can I feel a sea change coming. Actually, I've noticed that change is what's in store for me in so many ways- kids, friendships, etc. It's not a bad thing, but change nonetheless. I know that I've resisted this unknown change for a long time, but why? I've been holding onto an old paradigm that hasn't been working for a long time. I've been clinging to things in my life that have depleted and zapped the energy I need for my kids. On the horizon of renewal, I am thinking deeply about making some permanent changes in self-care. I'm not gentle with myself. I demand a lot of myself. I'm harsh on myself. I've longed blamed my crazy life with five children for my exhaustion, but I only recently learned that I've sabotaged myself just as much. As much as I crave and embrace simplicity, I don't always live it.
I may not be out on the beach reading a novel under an umbrella this summer, but I am reveling in the joy that simplicity brings in these brief slower days.
Today, I intend to make Fudge popsicles with Sam. Today, I intend to read late into the night. Today, I intend to enjoy the pockets of silence in my very noisy home. Today, I'm going to be gentle and kind.